Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Pretty Moments

Sometimes, people say or do dumb things ...

Example:

Visitor: You know you guys aren't listed in the directory downstairs?
Me: Oh, really? No, I didn't. Thanks. I'll have that checked out.
Visitor: Yeah, so then I tried looking [him] up under Individuals, but I couldn't find anyone there either.
Me: Well, I would imagine if we aren't listed as a company in the directory downstairs, our employees wouldn't be individually listed either.
Visitor: Oh, yeah ... that's true.

(Of course it is.)

And sometimes it's so far beyond a blonde moment the only thing you can say is "you're pretty" - as in, "I'm not sure where your brain just ran off to, but at least you're pretty." You don't want to draw attention to their brain fart with mean insults, so you give them a "compliment".

Example:
I walked into the mail room and a co-worker was trying to run an envelope through the postage machine, saw me, and asked for help.

Co-worker: Oh, good! It's you! Can you show me how to work this?
Me: Sure, of course.

I walked over to a blank screen ... (Seriously. Seriously? Really? I know it all looks pretty vague and makes loud noises, but it's not THAT difficult!) ... and pressed the power button.

Me: You're pretty. It helps when you turn the machine on.

I can't make this up.

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