Thought of Randomosity #4

Why doesn't Subway put out napkins for its patrons? I know they put one or two in the bag, but what if I'm dining in? Or, God forbid, just want some more napkins? Is this some subliminal message that I'm not allowed to make a mess? What happens if when I make a mess? I already used the ones you gave me ... Do I just leave the crumbs on the table for the next person? That's kinda gross. And I've never seen an employee wipe down tables after people leave. (Ew.) I don't want to interrupt someone else in line just for napkins. Why, Subway, can't you just put some napkins on the drink counter? I know I'm not dining on a $50 sandwich at The Ritz, but please don't make me feel like I'm a cave woman. Pretty please?


P.T.
I love Subway, but I don't want to smell like one all day. Can we do something about that, too? Sorry for being needy today, but it's the little things that count. Thanks!


P.T.T
Pretty please ... [head tilt] ... Is the pretty necessary? I mean, if you were asking someone for a favor, would you really want to offer an ugly please? I know, it's probably one of those sayings that just has a nice ring to it, but come on. That'd be kind of funny though, if there were varying beauty levels of pleases.

Tweet

"Here's Your Sign"

I can't tell you how many times at work I hear people say, "well how do you turn it on?" Okay, are you FOR REAL? I think by now, in our technologically consumed world (whether you're a techie or not) it is safe to assume a universally accepted symbol for the power button has been established. Google time, shall we?

Ah, yes. Yes, indeed! Eureka!! If you can locate this little symbol, you can usually find the power source.

Would you look at that?!

Now, I'll admit ... some devices can be tricky, but a little trial and error won't hurt, folks. Harness your inner 4 year old ... "What's this button do?" Go ahead and press it! Even us kiddos that grew up with computers, cell phones, and game consoles a-plenty can get thrown for a loop. Enter one eve when yours truly was dog sitting for a coworker. Keep in mind, I've grown up with PCs, and all she had was one of those fancy new Mac desktops that has everything built into the monitor. She usually kept it on, and would just go into sleep mode if you walk away for a bit. But one day, it powered down completely. Well, I was looking for that magical power symbol but it was nowhere to be found. I even tried feeling around and glancing at the back of the monitor, but no luck. I couldn't get a good enough view. I was kind of embarrassed by myself that I couldn't figure out how to turn on this stinkin' computer. It CAN'T be this difficult. Soooo, after much contemplation, I pulled out my phone and Googled it. I figured if I couldn't figure it out, there had to be more people out there in the same boat, but I wasn't about to ask my coworker how to do it! Seriously? Hey, Google! Where is the power button on a Mac desktop? Oh. My. Gosh. 

Why thank you starcelaeno! This made me feel much better! 

So I turned that bad boy around, and there it was! I must have slid my hand back there a dozen times, and definitely didn't feel anything! Glad to know I wasn't crazy after all ... I just had one of those pretty moments. And yes, it did have the power symbol! In the words of Bill Engvall, "here's your sign!"

Tweet

Yia Yia Black Sheep, Have You Any ZZZs?

As I was lying wide awake in bed last night, I thought of the old wives’ tale about how counting sheep will help you fall asleep faster. Why sheep?

I frequently feel like the girl in this comic strip before I fall asleep- questioning why we do the things we do and wonder what it would be like if we did it some other random way. Okay, fine, Yia Yia … I’ll humor you just this once.

*DRAMATIZATION*

I was in a large, green, clover-filled pasture leaning against a big rock, with my buddy Sam Sheepdog, while we kept watch on our sheep jumping the fence. Well, I only got up to No. 8 because No. 9 was vertically challenged and couldn’t quite clear the fence. Can I get a mulligan? Sheeps 1-8 hopped back over and round two begins. I gave No. 9 a pep talk and told him to take a longer running start. Thirteen sheep are now successfully on the opposite side of the fence, but now No. 14 is chasing a squirrel, sheeps 15 and 16 are fighting, and I just found a note that said little Jimmy Johnson took No. 17 to the rodeo for the World Championship Mutton Bustin’ Contest. I decide to let them duke it out and just come back to counting them later. What number was I on? Oh yes, 18 – 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23 … Hey, 27, stop tripping 24 and get back in line!  Dammit 25, how many times do I have to tell you? It’s OVER the fence, not through it. Now I've got the rest of my sheep taking off through the big gaping hole. Splendid! Can I get a new flock? This isn't very relaxing at all. I can’t sleep.

Wait a tic, why did I let them jump the fence in the first place? Aren’t I supposed to be herding them? Where do they think they’re going? These old wives’ husbands must have been really pissed off at them for letting all their sheep go. Someone has some ‘splaining to do.

Can I please trade my sad excuse of sheep for a fun flock of fleece like this one?

P.W.

Can we just talk about that nursery rhyme “Baa Baa, Black Sheep”? That tune sounds all too familiar … oh, that’s right! We’ve heard it before in Twinkle Twinkle Little Star AND The Alphabet Song! Next time someone uses that little ditty for a nursery rhyme, can we maybe get a little creative and drop a bass line in there or something to spice it up a bit? Just sayin'. Thanks.

Sources:

Found this comic strip nugget here.

You can find Yia Yia here. Opa!! That face kinda made you chuckle a little, no?

Here's where I found Sam Sheepdog and the big boulder we were leaning against. Remember him?

This video of the awesome flock of sheep was part of a cool Samsung campaign (linked in their press release) announcing their 2009 LED Electronic line up. Check out the story.

Tweet